I don realize say no escape for this thing wey she want make I do. I kon go the place wey she say make I stay, she begin give me instructions, where I go put my head and mouth and wetin I go use tongue do, all the corners wey I go wash. Omo, as I carry face near there eeh, I almost vomit ???? The kain smell wey dey comot from there, be like all the food dotty wey dey inside dustin for 2 days, na that kain smell. The thing hook me sha, cough wey I no know where e from, begin worry me. I cough sote, small tears comot from my eyes.
She just dey there like that, dey wait for me to finish my cough. Immediately she see say the cough don stop, she start again, dey change am for me to come chop the kp**o, say time no dey, say I go still climb am after I chop finish. I reason the help wey she go help me, if I play well, e sha better make I suffer this thing now and dey alright after, than go back to those yoruba boys, say I dey do conductor, make dem use me do yeye.
I hold my breath, near the kp**o again, kon dey slowly take my head down, na then I look the thing wella, e just dey black like say na 2 lizards ???? wey face each other. Mama Uka use one hand separate them, and e long wella, no be only that one sef, the place dey sweat eeh, that kain dotty sweat, wey be say if you use tissue clean, e go turn black. I still dey swear for poverty for my head, dey reason where I go start from, na so she push my head enter the thing, I wan kpai. Thank God say my mouth close, if not eeh, I for swallow wetin I no know.
Na my nose and one part of my eyes the thing rub, my face kon dey smell like the kp**o. Wetin this woman wan do for me sef, wey go make me suffer like this? I no do abeg, if she wan make I chow this kp**o, we go discuss am wella, she go pay me, or tell me wetin she go give me �
Matthew; Ma, I no fit do this one o. E pass me, make I no lie. I no fit carry this thing put for mouth. No be say you don tell me wetin you go do for me or how much you go pay me. I fit do all these things finish, you go still carry 1 or 2kpa give me, no o. I no fit disfagin my mouth for that small change�
As I talk am finish, I waka go where my clothes dey, pick my jean and begin wear am �
Mama Uka; wetin be this one wey you dey talk so? When I dey lick your kini, why you no stop me? You keep head like one agama lizard, dey nod, e dey sweet you. Ogbeni, come do something, jare. No let me vex for you o. The big thing wey I plan for you na wetin nobody fit do for you for this life, I go change your life. Shebi you know say I get money? Say one of my restaurants no dey do well again for now, no mean say the other ones no dey do well. I get for magodo, ikeja and orile, plus my other businesses. If you do well this night, you don pass your interview, I go change your life�
Matthew; If na like that, then you need drop something first, make the thing ginger me to work well for you, anything wey you wan make I do, naim I go do. You sef see am say I carry gbola follow body, the type wey you never see before. I fit dey your body like this eeh, 30 minutes I still dey go, forget say I quick land as I dey your mouth, that one na my first time, na wetin cause am�
Mama Uka; oya, how much you want make I drop?�
Matthew; drop 5kpa, make I use am ginger myself. I never put kpomo for this my mouth before, na you go be the first person�
Mama Uka; and na me go be the first and only person. I go give you 10kpa. We go play wella. You no go do am with another person, except me, anything wey you want, I go give you. As you talk say you dey reach 30 minutes, my body just dey shake, I wan make you prove am to me this night, after you chow my kp**o finish� �
She carry her orobo self go reach her handbag, bring plenty money, then count 10kpa inside and give me. My belle begin sing as the mula land for my hand. That na my 10 days salary, just like that. When I mention the 5kpa, I dey fear somehow say she no go gree o, this one shock me sha. I put the mula for my pocket �
Matthew; make I do you wetin you go like wella. No talk anything, I go treat you special now, like gallant queen wey you be. This raba wey you give me eeh, e don give me better ginger. Come, make I carry you go shower, pamper you wella, after that, I go chow your kpomo anyhow you want am, then give you better knackis as fresh blood wey I be.
Wetin I talk sweet her, as she smile, kon follow me enter bathroom. She no know say na the kp**o I wan use my hand wash, make e dey presentable for my mouth, before I chop wetin I no know, all because of money. The kain washing wey I wash Mama Uka eeh, I no sure say she don ever baf like that before for her life. No be small work sha, I lift chest comot for road, use hand wash am as I want am, I do am jejely. The thing just dey sweet her, she no suspect say na because she dotty everywhere, make me carry am enter shower.
As we comot, I kon get confidence eat the kp**o, I follow all her instructions, still add jara to am, as guy man wey I be. The place soft for mouth, like that side for ear where dem dey put ear rings. Me sef enjoy am, especially as she dey shout like small pikin, I think say the receptionist go knock for door sef, say make she reduce voice. Nothing wey this woman no promise me, she even mention motor join. Abi na when I finally plug gbola inside, she dey shake like say she wan faint.
I do o, sote, she begin beg me say make I land, say I wan kpai her. No type wey I no give am. Na the first time wey I bring out my mind take do am. 10kpa no be small money na, those girls for area no dey give me money, na me go beg tire sef, before dem let me. Their own fresh and sweet pass Mama Uka own sha, make I no lie, na only the money make am sweet me kpa